Yes, I am that dumb.

This is actually a story from last fall, but it is still funny. And since I just found the offending piece of equipment again, I was reminded of this and laughed at my stupidity anew. So, I thought I would share with you.

We live in a slightly older house with an older front door that has large full-length glass panels in it. The front door opens up to a little sun-room/front porch that then opens to the outside. The sun-room/front porch often becomes a "dumping" area of sorts for things that are either in transit from the house out to the vehicles, or from the vehicles back into the house. We have a habit of putting things there and forgetting to finish the trip and make sure they get to their final destination.

I went to a conference for work (I work in Highway Safety) and received this little gadget as a gift. It is a combination flashlight, seat belt cutter, and glass breaker, for use if you are trapped in a vehicle after a crash.



I took it out on the porch because I wanted to remember to put it in my mini-van. But, as often happens, I kind-of forgot about it, and it ended up sitting on the table on the porch next to our front door for a couple weeks.

One day Doug comes in from outside through the front door and he is holding my little gadget. He looks at me with that look I am used to getting right before he informs me of some ridiculous thing that I have done.

"Andrea - what is this?"

I explain the gadget's many useful functions and then ask, "Why?"

He starts to snicker.
"Well...since you've been leaving it on the front porch, under our porch light, right next to our full-length glass panel door, I assumed it was a "Do-It-Yourself Break-In Kit." It's nice that the thieves don't have to bring anything with them....no need to figure out how to break the glass or bring a flashlight to look around once they are in - you've got them completely covered."

I think it was a good 5 minutes before I recovered from my hysterical laughter enough to run over and smack him where he was collapsed in fits of laughter on the floor.

Oh - and we moved my gadget. If you are planning to break in, bring your own tools.